Today we are going to look at another marriage "stain" - Being Fulfilled.
It never ceases to amaze me that so many couples stain their marriage bed with unfulfillment. What if....she is better in bed than my wife? What if....he can provide for me better financially than my husband? What if...we just don't feel "in love" anymore? I've heard so many of these.
Time plays with our minds. It seems like as our marriages keep going...so do our imaginations. Some wonder if the person that they married can still fulfill all of their needs. Others begin to see the grass on the other side look greener and greener. Why? Pretty easy, actually.
2 Reasons: Lack of communication and incorrect marital motivation
1) Lack of Communication - Many of the couples that I talk to that feel unfulfilled have struggled with it for a long time. Trouble is...the other partner in the marriage has no idea. It isn't shared or spoken about. Needs aren't being fulfilled...but that info isn't being talked out. Why? My guess is that the person who is struggling assumes that their partner doesn't care, won't talk about it, or should already "know". So, are we to conclude that the solution to unfulfilled needs is to close your mouth and just deal with it. It shouldn't be. Be careful with the timing, but always bring up unfulfilled needs with your spouse. You've got to talk it out...otherwise bitterness and selfishness will begin to fester.
2) Incorrect Marital Motivation - A lot of times, we become unfulfilled because that becomes our driving force. We start to think that we got married so that our spouse can take care of every want or need that we may have. That isn't the case. We talked about selfishness yesterday, and I think it applies here, too. Sometimes we are unfulfilled because we think that our own personal fulfillment is the most important thing....guess what... it just isn't.
I am praying this week that you have a full, wonderful, and committed relationship with your spouse. If your marriage is starting to crack under the weight of "What if..."....get on it. Right now. Don't let another day pass without talking about the problems and begin to resolve them.
Write it Down: What are some aspects in your marriage where you have felt unfulfilled? How did they resolve themselves? If they haven't...why not?
See you tomorrow...
Pastor Brian
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